April 28, 2010

New TV Show

Boyfriend is just so clever.  I think he should move out to Hollywood and become the next TV show creator genius.  I love the way his mind works.  He proposes a new show with hosts Tom Bergeron

and Mike Rowe

The show?  America's Dirtiest Home Videos.

Huh?!  I told you it was genius.

April 16, 2010

You Can't Impress Me

What you want me to see...

What I actually see...

April 11, 2010

Gadgets You Can't Live Without

Hi kids. It's been a while since I've posted anything here. My excuse? I've been busy getting into the fetal position, rocking back and forth, and sucking my thumb as a result of the stupidity of the world today. I know a guy who smokes dope to deal with that same stupidity, but I decided thumb sucking is better. While it is funny looking, it doesn't make me act like a complete moron.

And speaking of morons, who the hell doesn't know how to crack an egg? I learned how to crack an egg in 2nd grade. That would be seven years old. I never did get the hang of cracking an egg with one hand, but cracking an egg effectively I have indeed mastered.

However, this post isn't about how brilliant I am. It's about how much space I have in my kitchen, which is none. It's also about the ineptitude encouraged in our society. Gadgets are for suckers. And gadgets that crack an egg for you are for moronic suckers. Check this out...

OK, first of all, EZ Cracker.  While it is an appropriate name for a gadget like this, makes me think of a white southern girl who puts out. Second of all, what kind of spaz cracks an egg like that, or cleans up the mess of spilled egg with a Kleenex?  I'll admit separating an egg can be a little more challenging, but the poor boob separating the egg in the commerical is just too stupid to live.  But wait! That's not all. While I couldn't find the official commercial for it, there is also a gadget that actually scrambles an egg before it's out of the shell! Who doesn't need that?

Call me Amish, but I believe in cracking an egg with your own two hands (or one if your not a chimp like me) and scrambling it with a utencil found in every kitchen. It's called a fork.

Now if you'll excuse me I have a thumb to suck. Or perhaps instead of focusing on what society is coming to I should go forth and multiply, populating the earth with the genius that allows me such amazing coordination skills to crack and scramble an egg.

April 01, 2010

It's Eastertime!

Photo and creative artwork compliments of Terry, the genius behind Bent Objects (some work available here)