October 27, 2009

There's No Easy Way

Taking a "field trip" during my lunch break the other day I heard a discussion on the radio.  The topic: What's this new trend with women wanting to be a princess?  The gist of the conversation was about how women today want to be treated as a princess, not having to work, letting a man take care of them. 

I've always been an independent person, earning my keep and being responsible for things like car maintenance.  I've paid my own bills and have been able to  keep a job.  I grew up with Women's Lib and was proud to be able to live a full and happy life without needing a man to provide for me.  Interestingly enough, most of the men I've dated were deadbeats less financially sound than I.  My apartment was the place we could go for privacy as they usually lived with their parents.  If I wanted to go on a date, I was the one who picked up the tab.  I felt superior and in control.  I could totally see why men didn't want their wives to work.  Being employed and having financial resources is power. 

The people calling in to the radio show, mostly women, were aghast at the fact that there are women out there who don't want to work.  They felt it is a woman's responsibility to honor those who paved the way, making it possible for us to have jobs in fields other than nursing or teaching.  (Not that those aren't valuable careers, but if you didn't want to see guts, or deal with other people's brats you pretty much didn't work.)  We are now allowed to get an education and obtain employment and it is our duty to do so as women, because damn it, we're just as good as men.

And then were spoken words from one of the hosts of the radio show, a man.  Words that rang kind of true for me.  "We all want to be princesses (including men) because we're lazy!"  Hallaluja! 

Now before you get all up  in my face about how bad it is to encourage laziness, I have to qualify my position.  You see, I've been holding my own for almost thirty years.  I carryied the load of responsibilities without a man for thirty-five years and have shared the load with Boyfriend for the last thirteen.  (By the way, Boyfriend isn't one of those deadbeats less financially sound men I referred to earlier.  When I met him he was actually doing better than I was, owning a house and a car, which was a step and a half above me.)  I've sucked up to the government big shots I work for in order to keep a job.  I've cut coupons to save money at the grocery store.  I've tried to adhere to my mother's rule Never Pay Retail.  Okay?  I've paid my dues.  I want out.  I want to be lazy. 

Shows like The Bachelor set a bad example to young women.  It encourages women to look for a rich man and expect everything to be handed to them simply because they ask.  It also encourages women to snag that man by means of sex.  Listen girls, it's easier to get up in the morning and go to work and provide for yourself than it is to play the sex kitten twenty-four hours a day just to get some guy to buy you nice things.  I mean, you have to shave your legs every day, look alluring - it's just too much trouble.  So basically, I'm being the lazy one having had a job all these years as I'm just not willing to put in the effort to keep my weight down or submit to unspeakable sex acts, which of course is mandatory when you are a kept woman.

So maybe "lazy" is the wrong word.  Perhaps it's just that I'm old and tired and want to have a life sans a boss and a schedule.  It's not that I'm trying to get out of doing the work, as was implied by the term "princess" so much as I just want to be done now.  I would totally get into someone taking over and steering the ship while I sit back and enjoy all the perks.  I have one problem.  Boyfriend feels the same way. 

Together we trudge on.  It makes no difference what our gender is.  We're both tired of it, but the world has tied us both to the wheel and we have to share the steering duties until we're dead.  All right, hopefully not until we're dead, but for a while, at least. 

As for being a princess I can only say this:  Even Cinderella paid her dues with the evil stepmother and all that back-breaking work she did cleaning the hearth.  In short, you can become a princess once you've put in your time.  Otherwise your prince charming will know you're just a whore.

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