July 27, 2006

Haunting The Earwax With A Giant Penis By Order Of The Devil

Things I learned today:

1. There is a restaurant in Chicago called The Earwax Café.

Earwax Café? Why not the Eye Matter Deli? Or the Boogar Bar? Earwax Café sounds disgusting, but from the looks of the website, it is a rather groovy place, providing dinner and a movie.

2. There is such a thing called Cotard’s syndrome. The sufferer believes s/he is dead, and often tests his/her mortality by trying to commit suicide.

If I thought I was dead, instead of testing my mortality I’d do more ghostly things, like moving things around on my coworkers’ desks, shrieking in that ghastly, angsty way that ghosts are known to do, or tripping people. In a nutshell, if I thought I was dead, I would essentially believe myself to be invisible, and the fun I could have with that is immeasurable.

3. According to the religion of Scientology: “Human beings are comprised of three parts: mind, body and thetan (pronounced thay’-ten).” (Quote found on

Thetan? Isn’t that a sissy name for the devil?

4. Mushrooms don’t always look like the ones you find in the grocery store.

We have, growing in our garden, very large phallic-looking mushrooms. At first glance I thought it rather cool to have unintentionally produced fungi looking so life-like, but then wondered if we are zoned to display such obscenities in the openness of our back yard.

This ends today's list of fun facts to know and tell.

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